The Courage To Say What’s On Your Heart

By on February 3, 2015

Is there something that you’ve been hiding in your heart, bursting to come out but you’ve kept quiet about?

A couple of months ago, I had a family reunion.

As I watched the young ones play in the backyard, I was reminded how fast life passes by.

Not too long ago, it was my siblings and me who were running around in the backyard crying about who wouldn’t share their toy or birthday cake.

My family was never the affectionate type. We rarely expressed our feelings towards each other, and even though we’re close (there were 9 of us total), we pretty much left the mushy stuff out.

When both my dad and brother passed in ’06, I realized I hadn’t really taken the chance to tell them how much I loved them and how much of a positive impact they had on my life.

At the reunion, I found myself reflecting on this, wanting to make things different. I made it a point to just soak in the scene — the kids giggling over all the candy in the house, the neighbors enjoying the spread of homemade dishes, and the relatives laughing as the kids fought in the bounce house.

I also made it a point to tell my mom how much I miss her and love her. Coming from a family that does not express their emotions, I wanted to break that cycle.

Life is too short and too precious to keep these feelings to ourselves.

So today, who has been on your heart? Is there someone you’ve been wanting to reach out to? Someone who has helped you?

Or someone who hurt you and you’ve forgiven, but have yet to tell them that it’s all water under the bridge?

What are you waiting for?

And by the way, when I hugged my mom and told her how much I missed her — she hugged me back tighter, water in her eyes, and told me how proud she was of me.

What a moment of connection! All those years of holding back because it was ‘just the way our family did things.’ Oh, well, it’s not too late to catch up!

Today, if there’s something you’ve been wanting to say to someone, do so. Get it off your chest. Be open to that connection. Be vulnerable. See what’s possible.

Stress Release Tip

Feeling a bit nervous about approaching someone and being vulnerable? Before you speak, slow down. Feel your feet firmly planted in the ground. Take three full breaths, feeling the shoulders and muscles relax with each out breath. Now that you’re grounded, go ahead and say whatever’s on your mind. There’s even more relaxation waiting when you’re through.

Mindful Moment

Bring to mind something you’ve been avoiding or putting off. What does it feel like? Is there constriction in the chest or throat? Do you feel unable to express yourself? Notice this rigid and defensive posture when difficult thoughts pop up. It doesn’t feel good! We might even catch ourselves avoiding the people or experiences that make these feelings come up. Instead, we can bring awareness to what’s happening, and let it go, mindfully.

Quote From Dana

“Being loved deeply by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
– Lao Tzu

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