How To Stop The Struggle In 5 Steps

By on December 15, 2014

If you could let something go today for more peace and happiness, what would it be?

There’s a nasty habit going around. It’s something that you’ll probably do today, without even knowing it. Maybe you’re guilty of giving in-to this habit already today.

It’s the habit of thinking that you have to struggle to get ahead. It’s the idea that if there’s no pain, there’s no gain.

Maybe you waged a battle in your car while driving into work this morning. Maybe you see confrontation in the way that your boss or other coworkers approach you.

The problem is when we see life as a struggle, and each encounter just another confirmation of this, we become tense — defensive. From this rigid standpoint, everything starts to look like conflict, or the expectation of conflict.

The beautiful truth is that this habit can be broken. You can expand your thinking and approach even the most annoying hiccup with grace and ease.

Just use these 5 steps to give up the fight:

  1. Notice your racing thoughts and the tension in your body. Reeling about the injustice of it all, we tend to make mountains out of mole hills – “That guy just cut me off! How rude! He’s so inconsiderate! I’ll show him!” and on and on.
  2. Interrupt the stream of aggressive thoughts by taking a deep breath into your lower belly. Feel your tummy puff out.
  3. Consciously let yourself relax while you feel the energy moving through your body.
  4. In this space, reframe your thoughts about the situation. In traffic, “he must really be in a hurry, I’ll just let him by.” At work, “There’s so much work! I’ll do what I can the best I can.”
  5. Be vigilant! At any time, this habit of thinking can creep back up and take you into the raging waters again. When you notice this happening, begin the process again.

With practice, we can rise above the struggle and let things pass. This doesn’t mean that you don’t care – you can still care passionately about your life without making it a struggle.

In this expanded state we become happier, more focused, and better able to relax when we get home.

From here, the view is different. Easier to take in and maneuver. This high road always wins.

Have a great day!

Stress Release Tip

Journaling is a great way to get things out of your head and onto paper. As we bring our attention into the moment of self-reflection and writing, the stream of stress subsides, and we can see clearly. Is something particularly pressing, consuming your headspace? Get it out!

Mindful Moment

When you’re listening to music this week, can you do it mindfully? Try to become very present to the feelings that a certain type of music brings up. Classic rock, hip hop, classical — these all bring different responses to the body. Dive in to the feeling, and see what you find.

Quote From Dana

“The more you struggle to live, the less you live. Give up the notion that you must be sure of what you are doing. Instead, surrender to what is real within you, for that alone is sure. As stars high above earth, you are above everything distressing. But you must awaken to it. Wake up!”
– Baruch Spinoza

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